New moms are constantly being judged for everything they do.Everyone thinks they know what you do not know as a young mom and in truth they do,only that at that point it does not matter.Baby is too light,too skinny,too fat they say.
It’s like they pointing fingers at you saying you do not do enough for your baby yet it’s your baby.They act as if you do not know the first thing about taking care of another human.Baby doesn’t have new clothes they say he needs new clothes.you don’t know how to dress your baby,you buy thrifted clothes,you don’t breastfeed enough you do not eat enough as a mother goes the opinions . They think stuffing yourself with food because you are breastfeeding is being a good mom regardless of whether the food is nutrition packed or just empty calories it doesn’t matter,they just need you to stay fat.
The judging is constant and it’s tiring.Opinions left right and center without a break.I feel like new moms take in more than they should and hence the rising number of postpartum depression cases.
The constant pressure for young mother’s to be perfect in the eyes of others makes it even more difficult to find the border between right and wrong. Personally I have been judged for the most absurd of things say for overfeeding my baby and not feeding him enough. Loving my baby too much and pampering him too much and excusing his behavior whenever he throws a tantrum. Its a constant sea of opinions from everyone around and it can get overwhelming and confusing,you do not need to absorb it all,you do not need to get it right the first time & every other time in that case,I know that experience is the best teacher at the end of the day.
Honestly it ain’t necessary to criticize and yet still people look at you and see inexperience,they look at you and see mistakes.i used to pay attention, listen absorb all the advices, criticisms then I realized at the end of the day you learn you grow and become an expert with time you do not have to know everything at once as your baby grows you also grow as a mom and it’s okay to not be right all the time.
I realized I needed to learn new ways in motherhood and unlearn the old ways, the ways I had constantly been made to believe to be right.
I raise my baby the way I feel is right by me and right by him and today if another mom needs my advice I just tell them learn your baby and grow with them.Babies are different and you have to give yourself a chance to experience with your baby to bond and to do things just the way you can. There is no manual that comes with motherhood but it’s fun learning and growing with your little one. Truth here is experience is the best teacher,seek help when you need it and when offered but remember to not feel the pressure of being a perfect mother no one is.Show your baby that you do care and be present as a parent eventually you will feel that you are doing the best you can and to your son or daughter you are the best and you rock and that is enough reward for anyone.
As they grow older remember to correct with love consistently and do not be too harsh, understanding is key to disciplining them as well.Nothing beats the love of a mother and the admiration in their eyes will just answer all your questions and erase all your doubts.
#From a perspective of experience
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